Thursday, June 2, 2011

You've Got Superpowers!

Dear Flash,

I'm not sure how you did it, but you managed to get me two free days off work without losing any sick days. You did it with a TORNADO. It made the national news. Every day that I've been at work or doing exercise, my heart rate has been shooting up extremely quickly. So I went to the doctor, who said it would be a good idea to rest for Thursday and Friday (I was planning on calling out on Friday anyway.) Just as I was making the decision to go to the doctor that night, and was considering taking two days off anyway, you managed, somehow, to form a funnel cloud in Westfield, then West Springfield. The cloud jumped the Connecticut River and traveled up the hill through Springfield, spreading destruction over more than a dozen communities. I was driving back from work when all this was going on, and although I got caught in some spectacular lightning (nice work on that, btw) and an insane downpour, I was far out of harm's way. Around the same time as my doctor was telling me to take two days off, Springfield canceled school. And today, just now, I found out that we're closed tomorrow too! If you happen to pull something like this again, child, keep in mind that loss of life is NOT acceptable. At least four people died. I'd rather use the sick days than have people die.

I'm still impressed with your power, though. I'm going to have my hands full after you're born, I see.

I love you anyway,

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